So I am in a local eatery… the server, waitress, what-ever their called these days is literally trapped in restaurant hell by a host of teenage kids who just came from a football game.  They are either being extremely rude or exuding an un-natural attitude of superiority while ordering, driving me and this server nuts.  The fat-assed and I ain’t talking a little, I am talking sweats when he walks fat, manager is completely oblivious or more likely, completely apathetic to this poor girls plight.

As I watch, my irritation level rises and my wife who used to be a server at Denny’s (oh my is right!) try’s to keep me calm and out of it.  This is just one of many instances where I have witnessed not just kids but down right bitchy adults contemptuously treat their fellow man or woman with distain simply due to their career choice.

Why do we do this?  Is this a god-given right to torment the waitress or waiter?  I would venture to say that we all have lost patience at some point with a bad server or a person in a customer service position, but does that give us the right to belittle these people?  Who the hell do we think we are Brad and Angelina? (Their probably cool)

I am sure some psycho-babbling “therapist” would say that people who do this are somehow unhappy in their own situation.  Because of their own weaknesses or insecurities these morons take out their frustrations on the defenseless smock or apron-wearer.  I would like to blame the parents but as one, I know too well that training and enlightenment only go so far.

Even I, yes the self-anointed right thinker, have felt my teeth grit on occasion when I receive poor service.  Do we all deserve the best service?  “Damn right you say”… really? Why do you think so? Because you’re the customer, big freakin deal Jimmy.  Seriously, because I am ordering two- “blue plate specials” or “grand slams” if you will, do I truly deserve the 5 star services I think I am entitled to?

I am reminded by my beautiful red-headed daughter that people just suck some times.  She slings pasta and is a photographer/web designer, both at the same time.  I guess most of us can be placed in the “suck” classification on any given day.  Yet I think we often don’t remember what mom and dad said about putting ourselves in the other person’s rubber soled shoes.

I recognize that it was their decision to work at your crappy home town restaurant or diner,  but for the love of Pete, can a sister just get a ridiculous tip every once in a while?  We are quick to make a statement with a 50c tip but have you ever given a ten dollar tip for a small meal and good service?  If your honest, probably not.  ”They don’t deserve it” you say “they just did their job”.  Think about that statement jack-hole.  Who needs the money more than a server?  Most of them are getting paid squat and are living off of those tips.  It’s ok to complain about poor service but many of us are truly uppity little shits when you dig into your pocket for a tip.

So when you lay that dollar down, think about the miserable little douche-bag who turns over the ketchup bottle without the top, or loosens the lids to the salt and pepper shakers.  Think about the punks who connect 75 straws together and sit at the table ordering water for 3 hours.  Much less the padded bra wearing micro-chicks who think they are Paris Hilton when ordering that double chocolate malted shake that you have to hand blend.

Don’t get pissed when you pile all YOUR kids into their own booth and they order the freaking expensive Italian soda because you weren’t watching!  You are their mother not the waitress,  pay attention and tip the girl for having to tolerate your brats.

When you are about to stiff the server look at the plate with the leftover pie you just put your cigarette out in and the milk glass you just stuffed your napkin in and remember that someone has to clean up your mess.  Jeez people I mean really…. ok now I am hungry, I wonder if Village Inn is still open?